How glad I am for coincidence yet again from the teachings of my spiritual path, and those of today's Courage to Change reading. Compassion is exactly where I am focused today. More and more, I see that the gift of this program is self-compassion. When I came into EA, I thought I knew all about compassion. In reality. I was more likely to know what compassion was not, than what it really was.
"Compassion was not seeking revenge, holding a grudge, calling names, or screaming and throwing things in anger. Yet that was how I frequently behaved towards this person I claimed to love. For me, the beginning of learning compassion was to eliminate such behavior." I had to start with me.
I thought it was easy to know when others did not have compassion, and for others to point out when it was lacking in me. Today I realize that is only judgment.
In dealing with my dysfunctional family member, compassion means I acknowledge I am dealing with a sick person who sometimes exhibits symptoms of a disease. "I don't have to take it personally when these symptoms, such as verbal abuse, appear, nor do I have to punish someone for being sick. I am a worthwhile human being. I don't have to sit and take abuse. But I have no right to dish it out, either."
I am more humble today and compassion is harder to define than first I thought. I do know compassion is a daily practice, of the heart. It starts anew each day, from being willing to love myself through God's eyes. Since I am the one person with whom will spend the most time with in my lifetime, "Let me learn to be the kind of person I would like to have as a friend."
"He who would have beautiful roses in his garden must have beautiful roses in his heart." S. R. Hole
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