But did I really jump 10 steps ahead only to "fall back down" to Step One? Not if I see the Steps on a clock face with 12 at the top, and 11 at an eleven o-'clock position.
And myself at the Center.
With this image in mind, I can make sense of my having to move to Step Eleven in order for introspection, then forward to Step Twelve to "apply" a program principle to my current affairs. When I needed to reclaim humility and admit where I was still powerless, Step One was easily reachable. In a meeting I might find myself readying to "take" Step Two, because belief in a Higher Power looks really easy when I see recovery in other program participants' victories. But then I might naturally move back to the Center of my circle, to reconsider. And step back into to Step Eleven for integration, introspection and continued prayer.
I suspect that my recovery had me moving back and forth on this arc, between 11 and 2 until it felt more easeful, and I became ready to move on.
I suspect that my recovery had me moving back and forth on this arc, between 11 and 2 until it felt more easeful, and I became ready to move on.
As I "made up" my own particular dance, I found myself on a moving wheel, beginning to move naturally through the Steps. With a bit more practice, I gained enough experience to strengthen my belief (in Step Two) AND become willing (in Step Three) to turn my life over more and more to my HP.
With the active faith in a Higher Power, I would find the courage necessary for Step Four.
