I've shared with members of my EA fellowship about my recent relapse. Today I found myself calling this past few weeks a time of (apparent backwards) motion. Something that happens to all good planets, who "wander" in the star lit heaven.
When I suffer a relapse, or in retrograde motion to observers, I need to keep in mind that I am actually on the on track. God does not see me as being beyond hope at all. My path may be auspicious, after all, retrograde motion of the King Planet (Jupiter) pointed the way to the birth of a Messiah on a long ago winter.
I am where I am in good time. Blessed to be able to look back with less fear, each day. Healing is no race. I need courage to assess my relapse. I'm worth believing in.
I think each of us knows when it's the time and place to tell our tales of relapse (retrograde). I need not hurry my process of self-disclosure and risk undoing my recovery. It takes time to relax and seek truth. For now, I remain content to contemplate my story in the privacy of my meditations and journaling.
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