February 11: Tradition Five, A Safe Harbor

(Adapted for personal use from Courage to Change in Alanon.)

Tradition Five helps me to set goals: to work the steps for myself; to have compassion for disfunctional people, to have compassion for those with come to our program.

What strikes me is the amount of love to be found in these three goals. First, I love myself enough to try to heal and grow by working the Twelve Steps. Next I call upon this strength to love the people I thought were once my enemies, recognizing that they too were struggling to live with this terrible disease. Finally, I draw upon these experiences and extend love to those who are following a similar journey--family and friends of those with BPD.

I know that I was pulled from dispair by the love of strangers who quickly became friends. Now I have enough love and wholeness within myself to share with others who suffer from the effects of family dysfunction. 

Today's reminder

I needed love before I even knew what it was. Now that I understand something about it, I know I need it even more. I not only take care of my needs, but lay a foundation for loving others. By loving others, I learn to treat myself well.

Each EA group has but purpose to help those who are seeking peace, with themselves and with disfunctional family members. We do this by practicing EA's twelve steps, by encouraging and understanding our disfunctional family members, and by welcoming and giving refuge to hurting family members.