September 17, 2011

Pleasing Myself First

Reading today's Courage to Change, I found it a relief for the reminder, that as a human being I have instinctive needs to fit in.

I do agree with the authors. The urge to belong and to desire for peace help us get along in society. Such instincts enabled countless civilizations to survive. Kept in balance, they do me no harm either. 

I've admitted earlier this week, to my own strong drive to people-please. I believe that drive is healthy, until the time I ignore my own needs and constantly put others needs as first priority. Or if I put pleasing others ahead of being honest about who I am. But what if I put honesty ahead of social graces?  I think there is something in that promise that program helps us intuitively  know what to do, without making my needs too serious and ALL important.   

My program helps me find  compromise these complications of life. When I put my program first, I find that I respond first to my feelings and take care of myself, while keeping my desire to belong in proper perspective.

First things First means working on my self-esteem. When I am at peace with ME,  I am a more comfortable participant in all my interactions.  When I treat myself with kindness and respect, my "kinder, gentler" me can better get along with others. An interesting by-product is that if I take care of me, first, I am less likely to get angry later at myself, or want to let that anger out on anyone else!  

Can I appreciate that all my instincts and feelings exist for a reason?  Instead of trying to banish my feelings, let me find perspective. 

I must be for myself. But, not only for myself. Let my gentle walk towards integrity, within me and towards others, begin today.  

1 comment:

  1. I still have difficulty doing the me first focus at times. I keep it all in balance so that I keep the focus on me without being selfish.


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