November 23, 2012
A Thanksgiving of Sanity
Today I am grateful for a safe and sane Thanksgiving at home, celebrating my divorce from expectations.
Two years ago, I was afraid to celebrate this holiday with "just" our family of three.
Yet, just before my huge emotional flare up and loss of serenity and sleep, I had almost lost count of the number of years since my last hospital stay. I may not have really been feeling superior, but I certainly was feeling that I had the answers, wasn't I? And was I eager to share my story as a success story!
I recognized myself today, when I read these words from Pema Chodron's talk: "When you begin to think that everything is just perfect and feel complacent and superior to others, watch out!" That was me, just before my fall.
Chodron's teacher told her that he was "suspicious" when his students shared that their practices were going well. He attributed their "ease" as arrogance.
Today I am glad to reflect on where I was two years ago, and see myself not taking my recovery for granted, this Thanksgiving. I hope all of you had the Grace to enjoy God-given sanity this holiday.