October 29, 2010

Make Me Easy to Live With

I am probably not alone in having a loved one that makes my failures something to comment about.   Mine, thankfully does not do it in public.  Still, I am not pleased to have them point out a past mistake. Nor am I happy to have them comment on my memory or my health problems or whether I am boring or not.  Do I dare tell my critical person they hurt my feelings? What if they just insist, " I've done nothing wrong. Everyone knows it is true. Why are you taking offense?" 

Maybe the lesson lies in the passage I shared yesterday, "If I am unhappy with what I receive, I might try looking for that same behavior in myself. It may not take exactly the same form, but I find that whatever I dislike in another is something I dislike in myself."

In that vein, today's CTC author posed this question, "How often have I justified my own unkindness, or my interfering where I had no business?"   Something to think about. Too many  times, my dry drunk ruined my life with her rages. Wasn't I right to point that out to her again and again and again?   

Well, just like my problem person, I am justifying insensitive behavior, claiming to be "right."  I can only make a choice for myself:  "I can be right or I can be happy."    In fact it takes self-love to let others be themselves.  "With help, I can live and let live."

Gentle repetition of our program teachings is helping me to let go of my certainty about what I think other people need to hear, and what they should do with my information. "I can respect another's choices, even when I strongly disagree." My relationships will improve by my working on my own inventory. 

I needed this quote today:

"Lord, when we are wrong, make us willing to change. And when we are right, make us easy to live with."  Peter Marshall


  1. Anyone else, have a parent with borderline personality disorder? Does the reading apply to your situation?

  2. It is hard not to speak up though when the dry drunk behavior arises. I won't accept unacceptable behavior and choose to not live like that again. There is a fine line between taking care of myself and denial.


I welcome your thoughts. Keep me honest~