The longest nights of the year are passing! Let us all be real to ourselves and our families.
"Before Al-anon, I believed that being an adult was to be in control--rigid, cool." An adult looked good on the outside, and avoided the feelings on the inside. Being an adult meant I did for others, first.
I've learned that having control over others is feeding an illusion, even an addiction. My efforts to maintain control, actually got in the way of human intimacy. Gradually I learned that I was powerless over others. I learned to put aside my "lookin' good" facade and began to share my real feelings and let go of martyrdom.
By focusing on my real feelings I became "real." Becoming a genuine person, I learned about real communication and relationships and found genuine happiness.
Today I can risk being myself. I can make amends to myself and stop trying to live up to anyone else's image of what I should be.