(Inspired by June 6th's Courage to Change in Alanon.)
Have I taken a close look at Step Five lately? It begins, " admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being..."
The order of these words, placing God first, then myself, and then someone else, might be important. As the author of the reading states, "So often I have been vaguely aware of some truth in my life that I was unwilling to admit to myself. "
Perhaps my Higher Power, which I often consider to be "that small still voice within" already placed that Truth in my psyche. If I am trying to ignore something, surely I didn't put it there.
Is this why God comes first in this Step? For even before I admit to myself a wrong-doing, my conscience-- God-- has already pulled back the veil for me. Today I see that admitting to God is the beginning of living in the light, not clinging to denial any longer. Once God reveals, I can admit to myself. Admitting the error to another person makes me accountable to someone on Earth, who will hold me to my words and encourage me to more honest actions in the future. Ah the wisdom of Step Five!
When making decisions about my life, let me look inside myself first to see what God has already revealed (or place) within my mind. Let me then acknowledge that answer to myself, even if it is not what I want to hear! Time and patience may help me accept a new truth about myself and in time I will reveal my thoughts to a trusted friend. The process of listening to God, accepting myself and sharing with someone who helps me be accountable, will empower me to move forward with my life.
"There is nothing in life that need confound me. With my Higher Power's help, I can find the answers to any problem I face. This knowledge gives me courage to follow through with action. I need only be willing to accept the answer I receive."
"Look within!...The secret is inside you." Hui-seng